Being selfish is not vice…

One of the things that come easily to every human being is being selfish. It is uncanny that the word bears negative connotations. I remember a dialogue from how I met your mother (a sitcom on TV) where Lily (a protagonist on the show) asks Marshal “What is the nice word for selfish?” and he says “Independent”.

My rendezvous with the feeling has been since long. Recently it was on account of an experience that made me feel evil. One of my closest friends’ father was hospitalized on account of a clot in the brain, something my dad had about 4 years back. And he had a miraculous recovery. I was very happy with his recovery and finding him absolutely ok was a relief, but I couldn’t stop myself from thinking- why didn’t my dad have that luck? Why did her dad survive and mine didn’t? And to be very honest I was more upset for myself than I was happy for her. Shear evil by the books right? But I guess I have made peace with it that I am “Independent”.

I guess people relate to things more easily once they make it about themselves. I have to admit that in my case it’s a wee bit much. But we honestly live in a world where hypocrisy=opinionated, ego=self respect, stupid=daring, agnostic=secular idiot=adventurous and yup selfish=independent! As we grow up we get beyond text book definitions and accommodate more meanings to every word. Our dictionary stems out of convenience. I guess convenience drives principles as well now.

I am not defending my impulsive reaction. I know somewhere I have not come in terms with my fathers’ death and mostly I was always selfish. But the “good part” is some of my biggest acts of kindness & friendliness are an outcome of this so called vice. I am nice to people because at the end of the day it makes me happy.

I think of all the power that the human mind has the power to reason is the strongest. It helps us to look at our vices and give them a practical twist. We reason to be accepted not just in others eyes but our own. I guess it helps me conclude that being selfish is really ok, as long as I can reason it.